Five-Minute Stress Relief.com

Forgiveness Releases Stress

Life is a mixture of give and take. And sometimes when we get the short end, the natural reaction is to feel emotionally wounded and angry. A multitude of medical research has found that forgiveness reduces chronic stress and protects our health from a myriad of serious problems.

For example, a non-profit group, called Campaign for Forgiveness Research, reports that there have been over 60 scientific articles published on the beneficial effects of forgiveness. The Journal of Behavioral Medicine reports that people with a forgiving nature correlated with lower blood pressure and those who did not forgive experienced more frequent acute, stress-induced reactivity and had higher blood pressures even while at rest!

Let’s begin with defining exactly what forgiveness is and isn’t. Forgiveness is the positive power to forgive others and to forgive oneself. It is not making excuses for unkindness, or condoning bad behavior; or trying to deny or diminish your pain and suffering.

Forgiveness is for you – not the wrongdoer. It is a process that frees you from being consumed with anger and fantasies of revenge. Forgiveness brings feelings of peace and acceptance. Forgiveness is an acquired skill that must be practiced to learn properly and the reward is self-preservation and a much better quality of life.

In fact studies have found that the inability to forgive not only increases one’s risk for heart disease and stroke; it also leads to negative changes that increase blood pressure, elevate heart rate, and decrease immune function (resistance to disease).

In addition, forgiveness psychologically increases one’s feeling of control (the opposite result of holding anger and bitterness, which magnifies feelings of helplessness). The power of control coming from the confident feeling of being able to overcome any difficulty, so that it doesn’t make you miserable. We’ve all experienced a state of anger that colors our view of everything else around us in a negative light. Studies have found that those who cannot forgive experience psychological distress, restlessness, nervousness and hopelessness.

Researchers report that subjects who are filled with unforgiving thoughts experience an increase in sympathetic nervous system arousal, the fight-or-flight response which triggers the release of cortisol and all its damaging effects (heart attacks, strokes, chest pains, stomach pains, backaches, headaches, weakening of the immune system and more). Dr. Douglas Russell, a Veterans Administration cardiologist found that the coronary function of patients who had suffered a heart attack improved after a 10-hour course in forgiveness. Fred Luskin, PhD, of the Stanford University Forgiveness Project, reports that people who blame others for their problems have a higher incidence of chronic pain, cardiovascular disease and other ailments.

How to Practice Forgiveness

• Begin by acknowledging that you are emotionally hurt. Sometimes just this admission creates a healthy sympathy for your sensitive emotions. 

• Rather than revisiting your injustice, focus on the good things in your life. If someone steals your parking space, be thankful that you have enough time to find another one, and your car is running well. Or maybe you made a stupid mistake, but give yourself credit for all the smart choices you’ve made.

• If you are really enraged, you need to calm your body first. Performing one of the beginning breathing techniques (Breathing Tranquilizer Technique or Lengthening the Exhale Technique). As you slow your breathing, your heart rate breathing rate and blood pressure with naturally slowdown. (See Breathing Techniques for basis of healing effectiveness.)

• As your physical body calms down, you need to reinforce positive thoughts into your state of mind. Say something out loud to acknowledge you are letting go. Verbalizing brings the intellect and emotions together. Appeal to your self-preservation as motivation by saying, "I'm hurting my body, I want to stop doing damage." If you act like you are forgiving, the emotions will follow.

• If you have a favorite place – a vacation spot, a nearby park, or a beautiful backyard – picture in your pleasure zone, in a place of wellbeing.

• As you regain yourself, try to see the offending situation in a different way (this is called reframing). For example, see the office braggart as the insecure misfit he really is; or the obnoxious speeding driver as a wacko out of control.  

• See forgiveness as way to get immediate relief. It empowers you to recover and regain yourself.

© 2009 Five-Minute Stress Relief - All Rights Reserved

Sources: Stanford University Forgiveness Project (www.hawaiiforgivenessproject.org/Stanford.htm) Forgiveness: The Greatest Healer of All Beyond Words Publishing  Gerald G. Jampolsky Neale Donald Walsch ISBN 1-58270-020-6 Exploring Forgiveness University of Wisconsin Press Desmond Tutu ISBN 0-249-15774-1 Forgiveness Is a Choice: A Step-By-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope Apa Lifetools  Robert D. Enright ISBN 1-55798-757-2 Total Forgiveness Charmisa House R. T. Kendal ISBN 0-340-75639-X

Print PDF Page for: Forgiveness Releases Stress